HeyNoobz

A Noobz Life

HeyNoobz San Francisco

That’s What Kate Said

January 7th, 2010 · 6 Comments · San Francisco · By: Casi

So, I have this friend…Her name is Kate. She’s not just a friend, she’s more of a best friend and co-conspirator. We spend more time chatting with eachother than our boyfriends (well, her fancy ass is getting married! So her fiance). We plan rendezvous (<~~ totally had to spell check that one) which include sharing my leopard Snuggie, drinking LOTS of wine, watching girly movies, and talking about really gross stuff and gossip. It boggles our significant others minds how we are able to talk so much. We seriously never run out of things to say! Most of the time we talk about how awesome the other one is, but occasionally we talk crap about people, our jobs (or lack there-of in my case), and her wedding colors. Did I mention I'm going to be her bridesmaid!?! No? Well, I am! Anyway, besides the millions of reasons I like love her, there is one MAJOR reason. She makes me pee my pants a little everyday with how fricken funny she is. I know I’m starting to sound like a secret lesbian, but seriously we are just friends (NO benefits!) I think everyone should have their own miniture Kate because then life would be good for everyone. Since she doesn’t like the idea of chopping herself into a million little pieces we have decided (OK, I decided) to add a new feature to SanFranciscoNoobs.com. It’s called: That’s What Kate Said. You know, like “That’s What She Said” only better! Since she has many one liners I have also included a Daily: That’s What Kate Said under the Daily Casi in the top right side bar of this very blog you are reading now.

The inspiration for this new feature was thought of after a very “interesting” story Kate told me today. So for your reading enjoyment, here is the very first segment of………..

THAT’S WHAT KATE SAID
(BTW I call her Katester and she calls me Cuzandra)

Katester: CAN I TELL YOU MY TARGET STORY????????????? YOU MUST HEAR!!!!!!!

Me: You’re right! I must hear it NOW!

Katester: So, yesterday I had to go to Target to pick up my bc refill, which I buy 3 months at a time.  I think there is some magnet force that pulls me in against my will into the clothes department whenever I walk into a Target. While there, I found the 75% off rack and it was full of plain long sleeve shirts – 75% off! so only $3 each! The catch was they were maturnity shirts.  I inspected them and there is no extra pouch and they looked normal so I bought them…three of them to be exact. I go to the counter with my 3 months of bc and my 3 maturnity shirts and the checkout lady gave me the weirdest look EVER so to explain myself I said “just in case.” which i thought was a funny joke hahaha. get it?

me: omg i litterally might die right now!
i wish i was with you! it could only have been better in person!

Katester: do you think “just in case” is at least funny?

me: that’s the funniest part!

Katester: I got the look of death from the checkout lady! BITCH!

me: Totally! BITCH!

Katester: I’m ONLY buying maternity shirts from now on, they are GREAT
they are extra long and lose in the tummy, like I’m totally gonna pork out today cause I fucking can

Casi

P.S. Beer (see previous post P.S.)


Tags: ···







  • Katester <3

    This is the happiest day of my life. This girl is BRILLIANT. “Just in case” Pure genius!

  • Pingback: Job Search or Dating Disaster()

  • KateAdorkableGrrl

    I have many friends like your Katester. And, I can vouch that most Kates are pretty f-ing hilarious (if I do say so myself) AND that maternity shirts are the best invention since ice cream….

    Love the blog, Casi – very well done.

  • http://sanfrancisconoobs.com/ casandrakc

    Kate's do pretty much rule the world! I think one of these days I'm totally going to change my name….but I kinda like how Casi rhymes with Gassy. Makes for great songs made Kate's.

  • GetYoid

    Why do you start your entire conversation with “So”. That is horrendous grammar. Do not do it because you see others do it. Its wrong and it needs to be stopped.

  • Factoid

    Because you seem to be so concerned with “horrendous grammar,” would you mind if I fix yours?

    1. Change the period after the word “So” to a question mark. You are asking a question, not making a statement and this error is confusing to your reader.

    2. In fact, you misplaced the period altogether. When ending a sentence with quotation marks, the punctuation is to go to the left of the last quotation mark, yours was incorrectly to the right.

    3. In your final sentence, please remember that “its” is not the same as “it's.” You are using “its” as a noun, so that “it” is a person, place or thing and “it” has possession of “wrong.” As you can see, this does not make any sense. What you meant to say is “it's” which is a contraction for the two words “it is” as in “it is wrong.”

    4. And because you are the grammar expert, I’m sure you already know that contractions have no place in professional writing. Your decision to use the contraction “it’s” was thus grammatically incorrect altogether and should be replaced with “it is.”

    5. Your comment consists for a series of four short sentences. A good writer knows that this is very boring for the reader and will combine sentences by using conjunctions (which are words such as: and, because, etc.) and appropriate punctuation such as a comma or semicolon.

    6. Grammar, as you must know, is subjective. This is an informal blog so strict grammar rules do not apply as they would in a formal piece, such as a newspaper article or a book. It is up to the writer’s discursion to use punctuation and grammar as he or she sees fit when writing a piece such as this. The writer has chosen to write about maternity wear, oral forms of contraceptive, and convince store employees; clearly this is not written under the guise of a formal, editorial work.

    For me personally, I am better able to identify with the writer because her use of the word “so” is engaging. As a reader, I feel a connection to the writer, as if I was her friend and we are sitting down to lunch having a conversation about our day. I appreciate the informality of this blog however I can respect that perhaps you do not feel as I do. If you prefer to read grammatically correct writings than I think lame.com is more appropriate for your tastes.

    7. Finally, I have an issue with your misunderstanding of the difference between opinions and facts. Opinions are thoughts you and I have. The sentence “It is a good day” is an opinion, because it is something I believe. It is not a fact, because there is no way to prove today is a good day and in fact, you may not even believe today is a good day at all. A fact is however the opposite; a fact is universally true and verifiable, such as “the grass is green.” This is a true statement, and thus a fact. You have presented two different opinions in your comment as facts and this is misleading to the reader. In the future, should you decide to grace the world with your writing, please identify what you believe to be true as an opinion. The sentence “In my opinion that is horrendous grammar” would have been more appropriate.

    If you truly feel that stating an “entire conversation” with the word “so” is incorrect, it would be more persuasive to the reader if you provide some sort or an example or evidence to back your theory up. I for example, am a college graduate and thus clearly smarter than you. I have provided examples for why I believe you to be completely erroneous; this has made me more credible to the reader than you.

    So please, if you are going to comment on someone’s grammar, please make sure that you know what you are talking about before you do so, otherwise you are the only one who looks like the fool.